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But there's another function: I decided to dive into Craigslist's "Casual Encounters" — a section made for no-strings hookups — to see if any of what I assumed about that virtual place was true. Is it populated entirely by perverted sexual deviants, serial killers, prostitutes and scammers as rumors insist? Or can two regular people really make the connection that the section's name suggests?
I should admit that I had no intention to actually hook up with someone, should the opportunity arise, if for no other reason than it would be inappropriate and manipulative to an unwitting partner to do so and write about it. But it's not a stretch to say that even if you abstain from the goal, spending a week on Casual Encounters can teach you a lot about human beings and how the web has changed how we pursue one of our most essential and important desires.
It goes without saying that the content of this article is not intended for children or those made uncomfortable by such topics. But if you're interested, read on for the story of my seven days on Craigslist's Casual Encounters — my failures, near misses, discoveries, insights and successes.
Following that, I interviewed two women to learn how they used the site successfully for their own fulfillment. Each day I tried a different approach to see what would be most effective, though I never lied or posted fake photographs. One day my message was intended to be sweet and normal; I suggested starting with drinks and fun conversation to see if we had chemistry, then going back to my place to cuddle on the couch with a movie and see where that led.
Another day, I described it as a rebound. In yet another, I explicitly detailed sexual activities and used very aggressive language. Ultimately, only the "sweet and normal" was successful, even though very few posts by women had that same tone more on that later.
I received about a half-dozen responses each day. Most were scams, some were men, some were prostitutes, and just one was legit. All the responses I got from real people on my first day weren't from women — they were from men. I made it very clear in my post that I was only interested in women, but a large number of men chose to ignore that.
They all offered oral sex. I responded to them politely, saying, "Just interested in women, but thanks for the offer! Have a good one. I began to suspect that no women actually used the site. The stereotype is that women are interested in relationships, and that only men would be interested in totally casual sex, right?
We know that's not true, though. In fact, I was inspired to write this article when a friend told me many of her female friends had owned up to using it. Over the next couple of days, I actually received a lot of posts from women. Or at least, they said they were women. To be honest, I doubted the veracity of the claims. It didn't take long to realize that almost all the replies I received were scams.
The situation is so severe on Craigslist Casual Encounters that posts by real women who are actually seeking hook-ups are often flagged for removal at the slightest cause for suspicion. The most common scams are "safe dating" websites. An alleged woman will write a man saying she's interested, but that because of the Craigslist-based serial killers and rapists in the news, she needs some extra assurance that it's safe. If you follow the link she provides, the website asks you for your credit card number — y'know, so it can do a background check to make sure you're not a criminal.
One individual tried to get me to buy him or her virtual currency in online games like MapleStory before agreeing to hand over contact information. Yeah, right — moving on! What little luck I'd had so far. The week was half over and I hadn't had a single bite. I decided I would have to take the initiative, so in addition to posting my own ads, I started responding to every ad from any woman who seemed at all interesting.
I cast a wide net in my searches, looking up posts by straight or bisexual women between the ages of 18 and 35 who lived anywhere in Chicagoland — a large metropolitan area that's home to close to five million females. Most of the women wanted something very specific they couldn't find in their normal lives: Someone to help play out a particular fantasy, someone vastly older than them or someone of another race.
Very few of the women who were advertising seemed to be looking for anything I would consider a "normal encounter. I typically wrote two or three paragraph replies and matched the tone of their own messages, then attached a couple of tasteful photos of myself. I didn't get a single reply from an actual prospect this way.
It turned out that most of the ads were fakes from scammers, and quite a few fell into another category all together. Prostitution is what made Craigslist controversial. There's technically another section for that — "Adult Services," formerly "Erotic Services" — but that's not the only place you'll find practitioners of the world's oldest profession. The prostitutes of Craigslist speak in code, but it's not a difficult one to learn.
They advertise "French lessons" — an odd thing to advertise under "Casual Encounters," don't you think? Well, it's obviously a euphemism for something else. Many of the ads that weren't from scammers were from prostitutes. The ads are so obvious that it's surprising the euphemisms are effective in fending off law enforcement. Then again, maybe they are law enforcement. Amidst all those failures, I had one near-success. A woman wrote in response to my sweet "cuddling first" ad saying she was in town for only a couple of months, and that she was frustrated she couldn't find a relationship.
When she sent her pictures, she looked plain but attractive. We exchanged a couple of e-mails over the course of two hours, tossing back and forth lists of interests and the like. Beyond the ability to make your profile really stand out, the site displays super relevant information about others when you browse their profile, such as a visual compatibility chart and testimonials section.
Beyond profiles, the hookup site has a large user base and a comprehensive amount of ways to find others and engage such as various search options, a hot or not like matching game, and a Life Action section with interactive model videos and live member broadcasts.
Learn more at XMatch. Read our full XMatch. With over 60 million members, x-rated pictures, live chats, and much more, Adult Friend Finder is simply a no-brainer for anyone looking to find casual sex partners.
This mature hookup site is easily one of, if not the most popular and well-respected names in Internet hookup culture and is filled to the brim with sexually confident members who very evidently are there for the same reason you are. Learn more at AdultFriendFinder.
As the name suggests, Passion. If lingerie and suggestive poses do it for you, look no further. As a hookup site, Passion. Think Instagram models gone x-rated, seeking out hookup partners in a smokey-eyed sultry, behind-the-scenes fashion. Learn more at Passion. FriendFinder-X puts a more playful spin on traditional hookup sites. The site is inherently uplifting, and has a refreshingly fun-loving, down-to-earth vibe. Learn more at FriendFinderX. To browse sexual classifieds in a safe, spam-free environment, head straight over to GetItON.
The hookup site bypasses the Facebook-type social network layout seen on competitor sites and instead focuses on actually matching you with other casual sex seekers. The site lets you easily showcase your preferences, from lifestyle to sexuality in a controlled, transparent manner. Learn more at GetItON. No Strings Attached prioritizes your privacy allowing you to keep your casual sex life as discreet as you wish.
Members can create and fully utilize anonymous profiles, to ensure identities are kept secret, and can even go as far as to communicate privately over the phone without disclosing phone number using the PrivateCalls feature. The site is designed for those who are interested in hooking up online and want to or need to fly completely under the radar. Likewise No Strings Attached attracts both those who are single and currently in relationships.
Learn more at NoStringsAttached. How you choose to communicate should really take up no more space than a single thought. For the best results, simply send an message at the magic-number length of sentences. For bonus points, sign your message with something that describes yourself, rather than your name for an easy way to casually start building up anticipation. Then, most importantly, get offline as soon as possible.casual encounters > that you are 18 or older and understand personals may include adult content. Safer sex greatly reduces the risk of STDs (e.g. HIV). 3 Aug I decided to dive into Craigslist's "Casual Encounters" — a section made for Is it populated entirely by perverted sexual deviants, serial killers, and manipulative to an unwitting partner to do so and write about it. The situation is so severe on Craigslist Casual Encounters that posts by real women who. 5 Sep How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? responded to an ad I posted on Craigslist m4w casual encounters.
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